Six Years;

Here I sit, six years later and still coming to the comfort of my old words. I reread, refeel, relive all of these moments that I've entrusted into a silly website.

Some days are good, some are bad. I can't even begin to decipher which is which at this point. My down days get drown out by positivity, and my good days are constantly being pulled down by others burdens.

My hearts yearns for love, for acceptance.. But my brain still won't let it happen. I always seem to pull any negative scenario out, and it's exhausting.

Scenario: 
We are sitting at my house.

You put your arms around me and tell me you love me.

You tell me you couldn't imagine being anywhere else but here with me.

My head turns it all around.
It thinks of all of the other people that have been in this place with you.

It focuses on the thought that you have said the same to others.

It won't let me enjoy the moment.

I am exhausted. I don't want my emotions anymore, for they just drag me down so deep.